bizzielizzie

Heading towards Weymouth. We had to come out further than we usually do, we keep away from the rocks and tidal races but the safety boat nudged us out further.
Firing on Lulworth range ..... gulp!
It is very wet because we get waves gushing over. It can take many hours to get here from Poole so lunch on the way. Sea soaked sarnies are really quite good. Honest! There isn't much traffic out here right now but there can be fishing vessels and diving boats en route so watch out for them...the divers have a special safety flag. There can be quite a number of vessels on the way in so we need to know right of way.
Once our sail blew out!.. and another time the tiller broke and we had to come in under jury rig.
Good fun though ....

Two things, daughter's research formed the basis of Panorama this week ... very pleased about that.
Even better - I had intended to add that the most joyfullest thing to remember in a dull wet November is you, my cyber friends.[No, I don't drink!!]

Think positive Jum says. OK, I will.
Started decorating today - 5 minutes in had to stop. Colour on chart and on container of paint does not match that which appeared on the wall! Much too intense, can't live with that ...hrrmph...
Discovered I can not only listen to music via You Tube but I can watch TV programmes. Apropos this, why is the vital equipment called the 'motherboard'? Is it because when it fails spectacularly it can be attributed to 'women - huh!'
Still thinking 'positive' despite visiting numerous stores in search of table lamps. Everywhere stuffed full of Christmas rubbish..
But the sun shone this morning and, er .. and, er ... just how positive am I supposed to be?! I posted a cheerful photo ... me on the boat - on holiday - in the boatyard... Now I am going to jump off the roof!!!

Needed a little table lamp. Bought one. Caught it just as shade was cooking up ready to burst into flames.
To the dentist. Husband needs £600 worth of essential treatment.
INR clinic. Cholesterol not coming to heel. Increase the warfarin. Pulse galloping at 122.
Drat and double drat.
As a cheerer-upper went to the cliffs. Plans for brisk walk blown away by fierce wind.
Stand looking at cliff edge. Cliff eroding rapidly, crumbling into a heap of debris on the beach.
How apt.
How very very apt ........................

I survey my world. Tucked into a hollow. Tracks through the mud, brambles, holly, nettles, gnarled roots.
My path takes me through small water-logged pastures, past cattle and horses..It is quiet in the hollow .. blurred at the edges. Robins flit in and out. Rabbits run across the path and squirrels climb high into the trees. The only sounds are of leaves stirring in the wind....
Ventured out on to the highway. Fast traffic, push, shove, get on with it. Harsh sounds, screeching birds.
The rough edges of anger, not heard but felt.
Edged forward - ah! - almost stepped on. I scuttle away.
Not for me the highway. I am done with abrasion.
Amicable joshing and jousting, enough depth of thought from which to drink new ideas and ponder on old ones.
I settle back. I climb under a leaf.
I wait for darkness ......

Well, the gasman cameth. He fixed the fire, explained the fault - a blocked air vent.
More good news, burned hair is growing back quickly.
Perhaps that is the end of our current misfortunes - gas explosion, hair burned and yesterday's bout of smashing crockery.
Well, almost the end.
Today I sprained my right index finger .....
but that is it I am sure!
oh la la!!!!!!!

Across 3 rivers, then into the water meadows. Cold, damp, strong wind building up,angry skies.
The days are closing in, 'the rain it raineth every day' ...how true. I inspect the flood defences - still good. I remember watching the construction, a masterpiece of engineering.
Gasman came. Fixed the fire. Couldn't fix my burned hair though. But it is growing back.
Nobody about today. Occasionally see someone, flip up a hand in greeting, a silent aknowledgement that you both like solitude. Like those little mudfish which flip a fin as they pass each other.
A bit like blogging I reflect. You come across somebody, raise a fin in greeting and skitter away, courtesies exchanged.
Depression is hovering up there, waiting for a chink in my armour. A huge black bird waiting to get me.
I marshal my forces. A sad little heap. Books, sudoku, Radio 4 ... Fellow correspondents .. hm ..
Not a bad armoury - not bad at all ..
Goodnight fellow mudfish ... goodnight ..

I looked her over again this morning, convinced we have finally, finally flipped over the edge of reason.
I refuse to deceive myself. Jum is resolutely positive. She will be fine, he declares, no tell-tale tremor in his voice. 'We are incredibly stupid' I said, plenty of tremor in my voice I can tell you!
We crawled over her again, the word 'crawl' chosen advisedly.
Remember the joke about the flat contrived out of a broom cupboard ...? 'Compact and bijou' ...
Charlie is compact and bijou.
Made on the Isle of Wight, which will please pompeycaulkhead, she is a little gem. No, really, a very very small gem.
We are proposing to tour the Yorkshire Dales, Scotland, Hadrian's Wall then down the Northumbrian Coast. Miles and miles and days and weeks in a dinky car. Nowhere to stow anything, nowhere to hang wet towels - oh la la!! The drive will comfortable, the camping will be umptydoola.
I give advanced notice. The aim is to catch the early daffodils and spring lambs in Yorkshire. Then to stand on Hadrian's Wall looking into the blurred distance, imagining the invading hordes and shivering. Who wants to be a legionnaire? - not me, mate, the prospect of advancing barbarians is terrifying.... and on down the ravishingly wild Northumbrian coast.
If, perchance, you should drive past a bedraggled desperate looking old lady - please stop and give her a lift ....

'You feel inferior because you are inferior.'
A joke I came across somewhere, somewhen.
Except I feel it is true.
I read the weblogs [for me you are spiders weaving webs, I think of you as Webbies] .. I am awestruck by the knowledge, the information, the detail you employ on affairs of importance.
I bow my head.
Oh, I keep up-to-date. I read, I listen to radio 4. I have my reactions which I sift till I have an opinion glowing there in the embers.
Yet I am not brave enough to hold forth.
I was in the audience at a debate some while ago on the subject of the inevitable depletion, nay, exhaustion of fossil fuels. One of the speakers was immensely effective. Charismatic and full of smart jokes he made the audience cheer. His opponent, calm, thoughtful, passionate, made a deep impression on me.
He made me think, consider, evaluate. I wept inwardly because he didn't stand a chance against the cheers.
I knew then, as I know now, how and what I think.
My dilemma is - do I run after you like Sir Andrew,
'So could I ..' - or do I emulate 'The Nodder' and simply nod ...
I haven't worked that one out yet. Perhaps I will do as I always do - hide behind the sofa -
I haven't got a complex you see - I am plain simple inferior ....

Across the high open ground, past the Black and Red Belties, past the Highland cattle ... watch out for ponies, their muted colours blend in with ths gorse and the bushes .. sometimes in clusters, sometimes solo, they have a habit of suddenly lunging into the road.
Wild and windy the leaves falling fast, carpeting the ground beneath the trees.
A stag dashes across the road, careful - careful - there will be others.
Pigs, white and blackspot ... lots of sheep. Sheep? They must have escaped from somewhere.
Here we are. Into the house, hugs and greetings and off out for lunch.
A good time to have a birthday, clever of my granddaughter to choose to be born in the Autumn. The rich colours, the golden light enhanced by dramatic skies.
Fires are lit, wood and burnished copper gleam. Conversation sparkles.
The New Forest - created to provide hunting ground for a norman King. Who knows how many peasants were shovelled out of the way ...
Happy birthday darling granddaughter ... happy birthday ..